Some days I just feel like shaving off all my hair when it doesn’t do what i command it to.
(via snapehasatrumpetingbutt)
(Source: thunderstonereject, via snapehasatrumpetingbutt)
Homework is important, but I made this powerpoint instead you know?
(via snapehasatrumpetingbutt)
Lawyer: So Mr. Hannigan is it true that you murdered Ms. Smith?
Mr. Hannigan: Yes.
Lawyer: Is it also true that you stabbed her repeatedly with a kitchen knife, then severed her leg and proceeded to beat her profusely with it for several minutes?
Mr. Hannigan: Yes, that is also true.
Lawyer: And Mr. Hannigan is it also true that you gutted the victim, then strung her up by her own intestines and took her stomach and removed her skull and then poured the contents of her stomach onto her brain in order to melt it?!?
Mr. Hannigan: Yes.
Lawyer: What do you have to say in your defense?
Mr. Hannigan: She was very provocatively dressed.
There are only three infinite things in the universe:
perceptual space, the number of Zubats in Dark Cave and human stupidity.
—Albert Einstein
Buddha promised inner peace but Thor promised to get rid of the frost giants. I don’t see any frost giants around.
—The Internet
